Was screwed over by the MTA bus system AGAIN, and it took me three hours to get home. I’m taking the over-the-counter sleeping pills because I have to be awake and commuting back to work in another six and half hours. I know all of you think this is a luxurious amount of time, and I know you’re all getting much more done on just four or five hours of shut-eye, but what can I say? — I’m weak. I keep thinking that if I sacrificed some blood, slit a wrist maybe, the MTA gods would smile upon me. Irrational, I know, but at this point I’m willing to try anything.

The average New Yorker’s commute is 34.2 minutes. Obviously, I am not working hard enough.

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