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Idle mind, melancholia

Noting my inability to relax and embrace the melatonin supplement mellow, an acupuncturist friend of mine suggested that I might be more depressed than anxious. Well, I certainly don’t feel anxious. I also certainly don’t feel particularly motivated about life.

Rhetorical question #1: How much of this is situational, and how much is just me?

I do not feel particularly sad, and I do indulge in small pleasures (reading books, eating curries, listening to nerdist.com podcasts – woo!). That said, I tend toward apathy and an incapacity to feel joy or love. And really, nothing seems to touch that. L-tyrosine, a bit. Fish oil, occasionally. And while some turn to religion, I have no such faith. And unfortunately, you can’t force faith.

Rhetorical question #2: Am I truly so different from everyone else?

I have a history of trichotillomania¬†and nail-biting, so perhaps dumping more serotonin derivatives into my brainpan (d’oh! inaccurate pun!) is the last thing I should be doing. Being not especially motivated and not especially smart, I’m thinking that perhaps it’s my dopamine circuits that are, as the scientists say, “wonky.”

Dopamine seems to be involved in the pleasure-anticipation-reward pathways. How do we define pleasure, anticipation, and reward? They are three distinct situations/states, but there could be some overlap.

And how closely related are the states of anticipation and hope?

  1. Dexter
    March 23, 2011 at 11:35 am

    Have you been supplementing with Vit D3? About 5000IU a day does my wife and I a world of good regarding our moods and our sense of well being. We use NOW brand 5000IU per gel cap available at swansonsvitamins.com
    Knowledgeable physicians and the Vit D Council want our serum blood level to be at least 60ng/mL. Dr. K who practices in NYC…a neurosurgeon that has begun to post at Paleohacks.com wants his patients to be 70-100ng/mL. Quite a knowlegeable paleo Doc. We haven’t found out who he is yet for those of you in NYC.

    Do the Vit D3 and the whole world will change for you once you get your level up.

    • Meeses
      March 23, 2011 at 12:46 pm

      I do supplement with D3 (and have for years), anywhere from 5000-10,000 IU a day. It doesn’t seem to make any difference. Thanks for the recommendation, though!

  2. winalot
    July 13, 2011 at 2:55 am

    Hi Meeses,

    Are you aware of any supplements that could help with OCD-type habits?


    • Meeses
      July 21, 2011 at 8:03 am

      I’m no expert, sadly. I’ve heard good things about inositol, but have never been able to make it work for me. The Paleo Physicians Network (http://paleophysiciansnetwork.com/) seems to be growing day by day and is probably an excellent resource for finding people who can work with you one-on-one to target any issues. Good luck!

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