I can fully recommend Punta Cana as a vacation destination. Beautiful beaches, beautiful ocean; all in all, very laid-back. There is a rum shed and towel swans. There are activities such as aerobics and table tennis and hair braiding, which I, of course, avoided. There are dance performances with guys in ape suits prancing about to a souped up disco version of the 2001 “ape theme.”

If you are very lucky, you will see a guy on the beach who will let you take a picture with his monkey.

Since my return, the week of dueling pot roasts has continued.

A quiet birthday all around. They usually are, and I received many excellent new pairs of pajamas! (Please feel free to imagine me in an Edward Gorey sketch at this time.) Tomorrow, I take off for Punta Cana, so until Friday I shall be drunk in a somewhat warmer clime. (Ed Gorey effect off.)

Oh, and Marianne got me a copy of “A Wrinkle in Time” (I’ve never read it!), so I can read that on the beach. Or buy a Cosmo at the airport.

Today, I’m 30. Everyone get drunk!

Er. DrunkER.

Dad has been learning about YouTube and the freedom of video posting. Wait till he finds out that 99.9% of us have no business uploading our collectively deplorable content! Somehow, I doubt he’ll understand “Ask a Ninja.”

Am I the only person who doesn’t love Godiva chocolates? I mean, they’re nice and all, but somehow they always seem to taste kind of waxy. Meanwhile, I love Ghirardelli chocolates. What’s up with that?

The temp agency I just left mailed me a holiday mousepad and a birthday card. Dudes. That’s…kind of creepy.

I’ve been to work all of two days, and they’ve already given me a bottle of wine, a box of chocolates, and an inspirational DVD. It’s really a bit much, but I appreciate it.

More good news: I purchased a long bathing suit top that will go with my bikini bottom, so I don’t have to worry about actually wearing a bikini in 4 days. Because let’s face it, bikini-ready is just NOT going to happen when I’ve only been able to go running twice this week and weight training once. With any luck, by the time I get to the DR, I’ll be drunk enough not to mind that I’m still a size 10/4/12/whatever.

Christmas shopping is pretty much kind of mostly all done. Almost.

You make a girl cry, and the next day she wants to buy you lunch. It’s true: evil guys DO get all the chicks.

Awkward!

Today, made one of my coworkers cry. Note to self: That whole stem cell research thing is not good water cooler conversation, even at a medical website office.

Crunch Time

I have bought exactly one Christmas present for one person on my list. Luckily, that person is my father, and it’s a big enough gift that it can double as his birthday present. Don’t look at me that way – having been born on Dec. 25th myself, it’s only fair that I get to give coal to everybody.