Merry Happy, Everyone!

I tried Tabata intervals for the first time ever today. Tabata intervals kicked my ass…and I kind of liked it.

Amusing: for my birthday and Christmas, various women at the office gave to me the following lovely, unexpected, and much appreciated gifts: an earrings and necklace set (dark red stones), a silvery, jangle-y earrings and bracelet set, a silvery sequined cosmetic bag with a 5 piece makeup brush set, a pink patterned pocketbook with subtle detailing in silver thread, a fuschia blouse, and “The Zombie Survival Guide” by Max Brooks.

I feel like they’re trying to tell me something, but what could it be?

Well, if I haven’t deciphered the code by the time the zombie apocalypse goes down, I’ll just try not to trip in my pink and silver heels like a sexually active teen in a slasher flick while I am distracted by my own bling.

Brains…

I am willing to bet that none of you mf-ers would be interested in seeing “Land of the Dead” with me. I’m basing my assumption on the dearth of positive response to joining me for “Shawn of the Dead,” and though I got lucky in 2003 for the neo-zombie flick “28 Days Later,” I’m still resentful about your lack of interest in the living dead.

In case you missed it, here is my not-very-good poem about zombies.

“Ode to Zombies”

Voodoo slave
You stumble like a zombie
Through the sugar dust fallout
It’s a sweet drug
It could be love
Pure infection confection
Don’t stop breathing it in

Black magic’s got you
Radioactive
Inside you’re glowing like the sun
So hot
The fever shock won’t stop
In the meltdown
Your heart’s a biohazard

Your eyes go epileptic
With spontaneous decay
Hunger penetrates like x-rays
To the bone
You’re mutating
You’re not the man I knew
This half-life can really get you down

Premonition foaming on my tongue
Heart in your mouth
Our race is done
Spastic panic
Brain and body
Pitch and cry
Dusk slams down hard
So do I
One last lucid moment sighs
Convulsion grips, or is it you
There goes the sun

On that note…

Here is a poem about zombies, which I wrote after seeing 28 Days Later, a fine zombie flick.

Ode to Zombies (or There’s Nothing Sexy About Zombies)

Voodoo slave

You stumble like a zombie

Through the sugar dust fallout

It’s a sweet drug

Zombie love

Pure infection confection

Don’t stop breathing it in

Black magic’s got you

Radioactive

Inside you’re glowing like the sun

So hot

This fever shock won’t stop

In the meltdown

This heart’s a biohazard

Your eyes go epileptic

With spontaneous decay

Hunger penetrates

Like x-rays

To the bone

You’re mutating

You’re not the man I knew

This half-life’s really got you down

Premonition foaming on my tongue

Heart in your mouth

Our race is done

Spastic panic

Brain and body

Liquefy

Dusk slams down hard

So do I

One last lucid moment slips

Convulsion grips, or is it you

There goes the sun